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here i am, standing in my own bgirl stance…

deep and shallow thoughts from various areas in my brain - t.tara turk

I’ve been busy/lazy—bazy/lusy, you get it

May 30th, 2006

Okay so it’s not because I’ve had a lack of inspiration or agenda or whatever. I’ve been flat out busy/lazy. Too much stuff going on. I’m one of those people who gets overwhelmed easily. It’s a secret disease. If I suffer from “not enough time to do nothing” then I totally turn into a flaky idiot. There is no cure. I know…I know…it’s a hard road. Don’t cry for me though. I am making it through. I didn’t have a baby in Namibia or anything but I know my road is still a bit rocky.

Sarcasm aside. Jacquetta, so very long ago, proposed the following topic: vacation, real or imagined. The smart ass in me says, “Imagined, of course! Shit, I haven’t had a vacation since…gasp…gag…cough…spurt…the Dominican Republic with Schwellie!” That’s sad. There have been some minis in between but nothing that completely spells out V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N. Just vacay. Sad. Too close to vacate. To me, a vacation involves a plane, a country where English is not primary, some stuff I can’t see in America, some food that will give me heavenly dreams later, some activities that I wouldn’t have the guts to do at home and maybe a few centuries deep worth of history and stories.

Sorry, Jacquetta that this isn’t more imaginative! I’m beat! I think Chicago took it out of me. Gorgeous city! Lovely views. How in the hell do you Chicago folks make it through the winter though? I felt the spring wind go right through my bones! Not even the art deco was enough to make me consider it a potential eventual home. Sorry. I’ll visit every June though…promise.

Finished shooting a short that I wrote the story for and associate produced. “Know Detales.” Look for it.

I have nothing else to say but my brain is overflowing. Has anybody else every felt that way?

OH! Finished Zadie Smith’s “On Beauty.” Did anybody else read it? I need some thoughts. I love her writing. Why does it always feel like there’s a finish line towards the end though? Is that my envy talking? She has my life. Dammit. I’ll see you, Zadie. One day.

Just had a thought: this blog might be my idea of a vacation. Very sad.

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