I tried to post something last week, I swear but Blogger was giving everyone the middle finger with the photos. It was my attempt to go totally tabloid like my favorites Concrete Loop and Crunktastical but they do it so much better than I do!

Maybe I’ll do a mini:

Phil Collins is the latest to love Chocolate

This is from Pagesix.com today:

June 22, 2006 — AGAINST all odds, rocker Phil Collins has fallen in love with Ch. 2 anchorwoman Dana Tyler just weeks after splitting from his third wife, Orianne.
Tyler brought the former Genesis drummer and lead vocalist to the WCBS-TV studios on Tuesday night between the 6 p.m. and 11 p.m. newscasts and introduced him to her co-workers.
“She’s beaming,” one colleague told Page Six. “This is the happiest I’ve seen her.”
The two met when Tyler interviewed Collins before the May 10 Broadway opening of “Tarzan,” which featured several of Collins’ songs, including the hit, “You’ll Be in My Heart,” from the 1999 Disney movie.
“They’ve been keeping it quiet for sev- eral weeks, but it’s out now that she’s shown him around the studio,” said our source.
Tyler, who won a N.Y. Association of Black Journalists Award for her reporting on the Broadway staging of “The Color Purple,” has been with the station for more than 15 years. She was previously married.

I knew it! Nobody can play drums like that and not think about caressing the real chocolate thing. Nobody! I’m for real. Need a picture of her.

Jodeci is Back…I’m not sure back to where but they’re back around

Dude, is it just me or do they look like they’ve been serving some time?? Member when Devante was sexy? Remember when Mr. Dalvin was cute but was the mercy group member because all he did was hop around behind the other ones? Remember when KCi and JoJo were the not cute ones but who could sing their asses off?

Nothing’s changed.

Except now they are connected to our girl Hoopz forever! How did she get out of Dearborn jail to shoot this so fast?

Feel the Heat!

I’ve been a Miam-Alonzo Mourning fan since he was at Georgetown. And so I have to post the picture below in honor of my celebrity crush (Yaze knows, don’t worry) and his team’s victory. My question is this: Why can’t Shaq let go of the trophy? He’s got four of them! Let the newbies run things, Selfish.

(Blooger still won’t let me upload photos!)

Diddy disses Lindsay

I mean somebody has to. This girl gets WAY too much attention! All her movies blow. Her nail polish looks like she’s been digging holes in the ground. She has my grandpa’s Pall Mall voice. We just need to stop talking about her. And I will. After this.

Diddy was really mean to her.” When asked about what happened, a spokesman for Diddy’s camp said: “Lindsay was being so loud and obnoxious. His security became concerned and came over to escort her away.” Source

Not sure she’s familiar with being escorted away, Diddy-style. He may not be super ‘hood hard but he is Hollywood hood hard and that’s way harder than any joker Lindsay Lohan will get mixed up with.

Go Fug Yourself

That website is literally one of the funniest fashion commentaries out there. Given their recent shout out in Vanity Fair though, I’m feeling like they’ll get so busy that they won’t be able to catch everything. Like Sienna below.

(Effin Blogger no photos)

Okay so I got the whole boho thing for a second. It’s brought many a close friend over to the vintage side (why should clothes be discarded like a pair of old jeans—wait that’s what they are). However Sienna is still young, in what-movie-has-she-been-in-again sort of way. She doesn’t know everything (including on how to pick a mate or movie). The boho thing was obviously some sort of astrological planetary mishap. Because now she dresses like Keisha the Crackhead. You don’t get a pass because you’re a vanilla girl, Sienna. You dress like a crackhead. Thank you.

($#($%*U^ no photos!)

So Britney thinks bikinis are for pregnant woman. Hmm. Interesting. This is a tough one because I don’t want to see the fruits of her impending labor. Yet, who am I to say she can’t air out her tummy. But I don’t want to see her glue paste body. But then that bikini won’t cover up all the important parts. Like that gross bruise on her leg. And her face. Did anybody else watch her interview with Matt Lauer? Did her publicist? Did they know a camera crew was coming? Maybe she thought it was a radio interview and it was 1939. She reminded me of this girl Sarah I was in second grade with who used to dress herself. Second grade. It was traumatic.

Whitney…remember when that was a good name for a cute little girl?

Um, so Whitney was spotted at church. And she’s apparently clean. According to A Socialite’s Life, Cherelle (“Saturday Love”—AND Pebbles’s cousin—runs in the family I guess) is “Whitney’s Best Friend” and is telling us why Whitney is all jacked up.

Cherelle (Whitney’s best friend) admits Houston was upset by recent tabloid claims about her drug habit made by sister-in-law Tina Brown that were accompanied by photographs of the singer’s reported squalid drug den. Houston’s pal claims some of the allegations Brown made were true, but the picture was nothing more than a shot of a messy bathroom. Cherelle says, “I told Nippy (Houston’s nickname), I was being honest with her: ‘Some of the things (Tina) did say in there (article) were true - not true in a drug form, but yes, you are sloppy! Yes, you are messy - not only in the bathroom, but period.’” Cherelle goes on to explain that Houston’s inability to keep a tidy home comes from years of having aides to fetch and carry everything for her. She adds, “She was just 18-years-old when she had a hit record… It’s out of habit, her dropping stuff down. Now I’m like, ‘You’re 43-years-old, n**ger. Pick that up! I’m not picking up behind you.’

A couple of things. One, they are obviously “best friends” as in the Brokeback Mountain tribe of “best friends.” Two, when did Cherelle get ghetto? Three, most of my friends who come from the church, get a lot of money and then smoke it up in crack pipe have a DEVIL of a time picking up used toilet paper, old beer cans and ashtrays.

People! A hundred years ago, we just got out of slavery! Up until about forty something years ago, there were folks who had overseer marks on their backs. You mean to tell me this fool can’t clean her own damn ass? I’m mad now. Sixty years ago, there were people being rescued from concentration camps. Forty years ago, there were people who were living in share cropping cabins (their descendants are still there by the way). Whitney, you get no sympathy from me.

He She Girl Bands are Hot

Well, there’s this group:

(Insert Pussy Cat Dolls photo here–oh wait, I can’t…effin Blogger)

And then this one:

(Insert Danity…you get my point)

I’m convinced “Danity Kane” is some reference to Vanity Six and Big Daddy Kane. Convinced. It would make sense. If you push the two together, you would probably get a prototype not too far away from them. Remember when Big Daddy Kane wore those leopard bikinis?

If You’re in New York…

And you’re feeling a little old school:
Kangol hats (now $10 to $25) and bags (now $15 to $35) are 50 to 75 percent off. When: Through 6/23 (11-7)Where: 411 Fifth Ave., nr. 37th St., second fl. (212-981-9900)

Lastly, boys and girls, Yaze is coming home to meet the mom! It’s a surprise (she never reads my blogs so I ain’t pressed). We’re going to see my girl Kerry’s new little bundle, Kennadie in the D. In the middle, we’re driving down to the CLE (Cleveland that is) and making a stop. And we’ve set a date for the wedding, May 07 in Goldsboro, NC!

On the business tip, I’ve been away because I’m screening films for AFI’s Film Fest. Mums the word on the diagnosis. I also reviewed Alfred Uhry’s new play “Without Walls”, featuring our favorite Matrix Magical Negro, Laurence Fishburne, for Westside LA Magazine—coming soon. Also, we’re shooting a short I wrote “Dear Me, Letters Me” in New York in August. Big things…