…from boredom?
Not sure if I’m peppy enough to be witty and what not but:
Jacquetta has given me a short one. Why my apartment complex is not like Melrose Place:
1) All of the people in our building are mostly Ex-New Yorkers and/or cool people by default. Except there was this one time I saw a cop car come early in the morning and pick up the women who lives in # ___ (you can’t be serious—you don’t think I’d tell you) after she had a fight with her man. That was a little bit ago. Last time I saw them, they were cracking jokes and eating Carl’s Jr. Wutang said it best: Life is hectic.
2) At Melrose place, they had a pool. We don’t have a pool. We do have a mirrored lobby, stairs and French movie posters. And lots of dogs. One chocolate lab that cries for his mama the minute her foot is on the gas. The whole street hears him. Don’t go “awwww” because dogs are like that. No matter what you do, you can’t break a dog of separation anxiety. There are all these books and people that tell you that you shouldn’t have a dog if you can’t be home to spend time with it during the day. Bullocks! Dogs are animals. Not babies. I love my dog but she won’t go out and earn her keep so I have to. Gotta keep the puppy in her doggy t-shirts.
3) Where did people park on Melrose place? Our neighborhood sucks at parking. I’ll probably hit lotto before I get a good one. Although one time I was praying to my dad and some spooky stuff happened. And I said, “Daddy, if the spooky stuff was you, then I’ll have a parking space in front of the building.” What do you think happened? Yup, Dad looks out for his #1 (that was my nickname for awhile, among others) even in passing.
4) Melrose Place didn’t have a crazy cat lady. We do. I speak to her. I really think she’s great. Except sometimes I hear her having a full on dialogue with herself when she thinks nobody’s around. She kind of looks like she belongs in a Shakespeare play as one of the witches. She’s in # ___ (ha! Sucka! I ain’t saying…)
5) I don’t remember any Latinos or Asians in Melrose Place. I do remember Vanessa “Keisha New Jack City Rock a bye baby” Williams in the first season (or few) but didn’t they get rid of her with the quickness? Maybe she didn’t look good in those power suits. Any whoodle, she made it big on the Soul Food tv show. And then she cut her locs. And got a perm. Well…maybe she would do good on MP now. She’s no Keisha anymore.
6) Believe it or not, my place is way bigger than anybody’s place on Melrose!
7) No dead bodies. No crazy psychos. Except there was a ferret that got loose. That was pretty crazy.
Our Amanda is named Lissett and she’s a mom and uber-Christian and nice and still has to work another job to make ends meet since she’s a manger and not an owner. So I guess she’s not Amanda.
I’m not sure where this post is going. But this is how my place isn’t like Melrose Place.
But if this didn’t make you guffaw, I got something for ya:
Some people have all the answers….
Tweet1 Comment
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL
Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.
Yeah…right…spooky indeed! Must be hereditary.
Comment by Anonymous — July 7, 2007 @ 11:53 pm